BEERSEXCHIPS N GRAVYMACC
Macc. English Dictionary
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PARTY

O'Peesha- Muttley's flat was ideal for parties. He had a skip next to the back door,- we could shovel all the debris, cans, drunks and vomit straight out- ready for the next one.

Muttley- You saying that I used to tidy up? You calling me a poof?
Stez- Where?
McCavity- That was no skip, that was my house.

Chorley- I made a really good punch at one party. I filled the bath with all the booze, then Stez
decided it was time to drown the Pakki. Stez was in a right mood, it took all of us to drag him away.
Stez kept saying: "Huddersfield" over and over again.

Git- Strangely enough, I was never invited to one of McLad's famous soirees.

 

PIETASTER

Git- This was the 'A' side of the single, and entered the National Chart on St George's Day, 1988 at number 95- along with Fairground Attraction. The talented Scots shuffled up to No 1.
The Macc Lads didn't.

O'Peesha- Eee! The trouble this caused! Titterton's got invaded by hacks wanting to interview
the fat woman that tastes the pies! Loads of journalists wandering from factory to factory looking for a fat tart that needs ironing. Talk about Gullible's Travels!

Beater- The first version was best. The one I did. The LP version was shite.
McCavity- But you took about ten goes to get it right. I did it in one take!
Beater- Yeah, sounds like it.

 

PILES

Git- Released first as a demo, then re-recorded for the Alehouse Rock LP.
I liked the first version as it was cheaper.

Muttley- We had a peek at one of Knobby's Reader's Wives mag -

on the stickiest page, in between the staples,
was this huge fuck-off bunch of grapes.

 

POODLES

Git- Of course this happened to a friend of a friend.
But small puppies look better on car radiator
grilles than those plastic red noses.
Plus you are safe in the knowledge that non of your
wages have found their way to charity.

 

PRESTBURY GIRLS

Git-Prestbury is known as the 'Millionaire's Village'.
When the Lads visit me, they have to remove
their shoes
at the parish boundary.

Bald Eagle- I went a bit overboard with the farmyard noises on this,
but I liked the way Winston
hit the anvil. He got the chains off in the end.

 

ROCKWEILERS

Git- For collectors of trivia, the dog's name is Rowell- a particularly dim mongrel belonging to Al O'Peesha. Knobby comes round when his anal sacks need emptying.
It is the same dog to whom we asked the fanclub to write :-
"Dear Rowell, We think the Mac Lads are ded good.
Can you tell us wen they will be gigging in Yorkshire?"
"Dear Puddings, Rowell is a dog, and can't read. However, we read your letter to him.
He went in the yard and shat. Hope this helps."

 

SATURDAY NIGHT

O'Peesha- This song got ridiculous. At some gigs, the middle bit used to go on for ages, they put the snooker music in it, the Grand Prix theme, all kinds of rubbish.
Mard- That’s coz we never told you what we were going to do!
Dread- Ha! Look on bald honky’s face when we all start to play de ‘Snooker’ tune!
And im not know de chords!

Git- Many was the time that O’Peesha would look concerned during a concert- him having
received a completely different set list to everyone else.

 

STOPPY BACK

Git- Since my boys have run up enough slates to roof a large town, I have left strict instructions viz-a -viz After Hours Drinking. I was once present during one of these sessions, and my 'round' (I think that is the correct term) came to an extortionate sum. 20 pints of bitter, plus Pimms for myself, meths for McCavity and a can of Lilt for Winston Dread. I insisted on a receipt.

 

SWEATY BETTY

Muttley- My pathetic attempt to rip-off Georgy Girl by the Seekers.
Beater- Its got a minor chord in it!
Mard- Not when I play it.

Chorley- Anyone heard that German single?
Its a cover of this, called Fette Motte?
Stez- Shut the fuck up, you wittering woman.

 

(Don't Fear The) SWEEPER

Git- At last, a football song from the Lads. McLad discovered that there are few songs to be sung when your team is useless and 4-0 down on a wet Tuesday. I am surprised that "You might have scored, but we've got bigger knobs" does not echo around Anfield more frequently.

O'Peesha- Fuck the chariot race in Ben Hur, the finest piece of cinematic history is this song on
Sex Pies and Videotape. Bach is a star.
Chorley- And a stupid fat tub.

 

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